plot twist: pizza guy wins the oscar for best male in a leading role
"What does the chef recommend?"
"Sir, this is a mcdonalds"
REMEMBER SKIP-IT FROM THE 90’S
my weapon of choice during school yard fights
Do you ever feel so happy that you think nothing can bring you down then two minutes later you want to lie in your bed and never get out because you’re so sad…
so i help with a class of 2nd graders and today a boy told a little girl that she was too quiet. her response was “it’s because i’m busy plotting your murder.” then she just did this evil laugh and walked away all sassy. this is what i want my child to be like.
*gets punched under the mistletoe*